To All the Single Ladies

I know exactly how you feel because I am single too. If anything, this is a heart to heart, to let you know that you are not the only one feeling the way you do. There’s someone else too. In fact, many.

Let’s start from the beginning. There’s a reason I refrained from calling you single “girls” because come on, that’s not what a lot of us are anymore. The mirror confirms it. Our relatives second it.

Most of the people you know who are close to your age are well, not single anymore. They are either going steady in a relationship if not already married with kids. There is this particular stage when wedding cards keep pouring in at your home. Some of them might even be of people you care about. But do you feel really happy when you see those? You comment on the colour, graphics and venue, to divert your attention from the elephant in the room — there goes another one but not you.

The worst are those times when no matter how confident you are, you are pushed to wonder if there is something wrong with you. You know for a fact that when you pushed away an opportunity, you did the right thing. You got yourself out before all hell broke loose. Still later, when you sit alone watching YouTube videos, you doubt yourself.

I love eating out. But whenever I eat out alone, I can’t help noticing a certain kind of sympathy in people’s eyes. It does get a bit to you when the waiter comes and takes away the chair opposite you to seat other customers. That too, without asking you because after a few times, they recognise you as “the one who comes alone.”

Then, there are your well-wishers. Your family and friends can’t stop worrying about your single status. At times, they seem sadder for you than you actually feel for yourself.

You end up doing a lot of stuff on your own — shopping, sight-seeing, watching movies and other everyday stuff like eating. You learn to be self-sufficient because you never know how long it will be like this. You learn to smile when you see couples deeply in love.

Most of all, you learn to accept that some things like love, the kind that lasts, cannot be rushed. It cannot be forced to happen. So till it does, you stand by as your biggest support, loving yourself.

Yet another single lady

19 thoughts on “To All the Single Ladies

  1. Very well said. Being single is not a tragedy.
    Love comes when the time is right. Nobody can order it anyway
    So the best is to be in love with we are every day. It’s the start
    The rest will unfold some day.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m 59 and have always been single and on those days when I hate it (and there are some), I remind myself I have one of the greatest lives of everyone I know. I’m not relationship-adverse and I adore the men in my life (whose support and kindness probably makes it easier for me than some), but it just hasn’t happened for me. I’m still hopeful….I’d like a partner down this path of life. But I want one who fits and makes my good life even better. I have a strong appreciation for the couples I know who cherish each other. Who would want less than that? Hang in there until you find the best for you. And don’t stop living life fully while you wait.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much, Kim for taking out the time to add something so lovely to my post. ☺
      I have also always been single. So I know how it hurts at times. But that doesn’t mean that we rush into things and have more than we can handle. Till it happens to us, we must still enjoy ourselves.
      And for it to happen, we must accept people for who they are. Because that is what love is. ❤

      Liked by 2 people

  3. So true, and great advice. Each stage of life is acceptable, if we can accept ourselves. And then, there are we who are single through tragedy and divorce. No stage of life is easy. All stages can be adequate, even joyful. (Still working on the joy part!) All experiences are calculated for our growth.

    Liked by 1 person

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